Fighting Against All Odds: The Marine's Path

Delve into the remarkable journey of U.S. Marine from 3/1 Infantry Battalion. Cpl. Sharma unveils poignant and harrowing experiences - from the profound impact of encountering his first enemy kia on the battlefield to enduring weeks without a single shower. Raw and unfiltered, he bravely opens up about his personal struggle with PTSD, taking us through the depths of his emotional battles. As the black sheep of his family, he defied all expectations, fearlessly choosing to stand up and fight for his country against all odds. Brace yourself for an inspiring and truly motivating narrative that will leave you cheering, "Hooorah!"

Transcript

0:01

Hey, what's up guys? This is your boy, Nelson Martinez. Robledo. Welcome to Combat Mike. And today we got a Marine, finally a Marine Joe. The fuck, man. It's hard, bro. We're all looking for crayons all the time and I don't blame you though. That's why they're out of stock at the stores now, but let's introduce our guest brother. You want to introduce yourself? Hey, what's going on, man? Rahul Sharma, 3rd Battalion, 1st Marines, Cap, Platoon, Machine Gunner. Damn. How y'all doing? Good, good, brother. Thank you, man. Thank you for coming on. It's an honor to have you on here, man. So without further ado, let's jump into that Combat Mike story if you want to share with us. Yeah, man. So we're posted up at a L. P. O. P. Along MSR Golden. Just sitting there, minding our own fucking business. Little Toyota Corolla fucking comes up and down the road and I'm like, Yo, what the fuck's going on? We had our seven ton are 80 ones close to the road. I was with Sawyer Staff Sergeant Heart and Sergeant Mendez at the time in the vehicle. I was a gunner. Sorry was the driver and we just been fucking around. Like fuck. Yeah, we're ready for a bite. Ready for a bite. And we're boots at this fucking point. Our first deployment. We don't fucking know any better. We're all excited to get shot at and shit. And here comes this little fucking Toyota, man. Just fucking circling. Had four dudes poke out with some fucking AKs. And start unloading on us. And the 7 ton calls fucking a tick. Troops in contact. So we peel from our position. I'm up in the gun on the fucking 240. And we start fucking rocking and rolling at these motherfuckers. And there's a semi coming down the fucking road. And old Haji man, fuckin I guess he slammed on his brakes and he got out. And Mark Bevins, he was our Mark 19 gunner and one of the other Humbies, told me he had a fuckin gun. So dude's trying to hide underneath this truck. And I've never seen a motherfucker be more meticulous with an indirect fire fuckin weapon, man. Precision. Oh, Bevins! Starts lighting up as a big motherfucker. You talking about a crown eating motherfucking talk slow like this. fucking came to a gun fight That dude was fucking on. Boy, man. So he starts lighting the front of this fucking semi up and he sees, oh, hodge man, fucking duck. Dive underneath the fucking front of the truck. He's bouncing rounds and blows the shit out of this fucking dude while the rest of the guys are fucking engaged in that vehicle. And that was, I think the first time I saw my dead body in combat and it's something that I won't fucking ever forget. Like dude's fucking shit was just split half open. Like you got H, HEDP rounds fucking going in at you at a 40 mic. Ain't gonna be fucking none left. Hell no. That's f crazy. So where did that happen at? It was in 2005 in in Haditha, man. This was right outside of Haditha, actual in between the dam and Al Asad airbase. But we were just on our little f LBOP post, list and observation post. Just watching the roads, watching for anybody digging around, f around. And yeah, I think that was the first one that we got into it. And it's one that's always stuck out because once that happened and we started to fucking consolidate, there's a little compound that we rolled up on where the vehicle had driven into and I guess there was a back door that they got out of, we pull up to this fucking place and the dude's got a couple of fucking Mercedes parked up in a garage and shit. It's yo, what's really fucking going on? Let's go investigate this shit. Yeah, that's that's where I got my. Yeah, he's got all the good fuckin hashish and the fuckin heroin hidin in the fuckin back of his fuckin co chasing jacket, bitches. We found a lot of hashish in our first deployment. Yeah, oh yeah. Damn, that's crazy. Shit, the first deployment we found a shit ton of hashish, but the second deployment when we were on the 13th MEU, and we went into, we were outside of Cop Golden, outside of Fallujah and TQ I think the best discovery we ever found was a field full of fucking raggy. Damn. That's fucking hot tea for watermelons. Shit. That was the shit, bro. We were on fucking QRF and we're just doing our fucking thing. And they call us and they're like, Hey, we got his fucking motherfuckers. They're transporting this shit. We don't know what the fuck it is. We get up over there. It's chucks full of fucking watermelon, bro Best and worst fucking experience because i'm like, oh fuck we're about to get some shit And then we pulled up it's fucking watermelons best fucking treat we had in fucking country That's fucking crazy fucking moon dust fucking camera, right? Oh, yeah, dude. That was I think that was the worst fucking camp I've ever been a part of was fucking, but the golden showers were amazing. Oh, man. Wow, nice. Sounds interesting. Oh, it didn't matter if you took a shower. As soon as you walked out of that bitch, you were dirty, right? Yeah, you're a fucking sugar cookie, man. All that moon dust. Like you got wet, you got fucking sweaty. You're fucking covered in dust. It didn't matter nothing. So fine. Like it was so fine. The dust was so fine. It wasn't like. You just hit it like that. It was like a big old fucking club, like fucking big. Yeah, I'm still wiping that shit out of my cracks. Oh damn it. It was quite the experience, man. I think with Weapons Company me and Robledo we did a couple of things together. For the most part, I think we were in different sections. The entire yeah. I was gonna ask man talking about being dirty, as soon as you get out. So what was the longest period of time you guys went without a shower out there? Ooh, fuck. I'd probably say it was like for 21 days, I think. 21 days? I think it was 30. Yeah. 21 days. It was three weeks, man. When we were doing that push into into Haditha and they wouldn't like, we had the hot showers, but we couldn't fucking use them. No, and then we would get there and it would be like, Hey, there's no water. Wait till next time, dude. All the fucking cooks were nice and clean though, motherfuckers making their powdered eggs, bullshit. I want to say it was about the same fucking time for us, man. There was a period of time where you're just pushing into new territory. There isn't any time to fucking pull out and go back. There's no rest, no nothing. You just keep going and going. I remember that time we got back, dude, because we were living in tents back at the FOB, right? When everybody, I was like one of the first ones to make it to the fucking showers, dude. When I come back into the tent, holy shit, man. It smelled like I just fucking snorted a fucking booty hole, bro. That shit reeked. Hey, you know what? That's when the trend fucking started, eating ass right there. Yeah, there you go. I was like, so that's what it tastes like. I was surprised a lot of motherfuckers didn't have pink eye just walking into a goddamn tent. Yeah. It's mob level four, fucking just walking in there. We needed right, bro. Yeah, it was a crazy time, man, but it was probably the fucking best time of my life. I can say that for sure. Yeah. So growing up. I was fucking born in India. Everybody looks at me and starts talking Spanish. I'm like, I know nothing. I'm not from this place. I don't know what, bro. That's awesome. You want a slurpee? I got you, mother bitch. A slurpee? So what made you decide to join the military, man? And why the Marines? It was a couple of things, man. 9 11 happened when I was a junior in high school, and I'm sitting in my fucking economics class, and my teacher at the time, I fucking won't forget it, Mr. Broussard, put it on the TV. He's hey, I don't want to shelter you from the world, but here's what's going on. There's a lot of bad people. One of my really good friends, Kevin Miller he'd been talking to a marine recruiter and he's hey dawg, I'm fucking joining up. I was like, okay, fuck it Let's go and for me being east indian you know dealing with racism is one of those things like they don't talk about indians or like even with latinos They don't talk about us having to deal with fucking racist shit Like I got my ass jumped my parents restaurant at the time got fucking vandalized And I was like, you know what? Fuck that shit, bro. I'm gonna go show these motherfuckers. What's up? And the real reason that I joined the Marine Corps was to really piss my dad off. Him and I never, we never got along, man. My older brothers, I'm the youngest of three. My older brothers went to fucking college and doing this, that, or the other. And I was always the fucking black sheep. So being a fucking immigrant. If you don't act like everybody else you're in the Indian culture, you're whitewashed So I was the fucking black sheep that was whitewashed I was a punk kid fucking skateboarding fucking nails painted in a little fucking band, whatever. Yeah, so I was like, you know what? Fuck you dad. I'm gonna go join the fucking Marines So the crazy thing is I actually went to boot camp in 2002 Broke my wrist, got medically separated, went back a year later, just because I was like, you know what, I fucking decided to do this, and I'm not gonna fucking stop, so I went back in like a fucking idiot, and here we are. Now, I really respect that commitment, man, pushing through and getting it done, bro, that means a lot. That's why you're a Marine, right? Fuck it. Cause I don't know any better. So I gotta ask this what is, what flavor of crayon is your preference? Oh man, the key lime. It goes great with pie. It goes great with a nice fucking whiskey. Like it's almost a sea foam green. So you could do like seafood, but it also equates to dessert. Delicious. There you go. Delicious. Awesome. No, that's what's up man. So how many deployments did you guys do? I did two with with 3 1 the one to Haditha and then the 13th Mew and a lot of crazy shit in between when we were back, man. I think one of the stories me and Robledo touched on when we met up at Justin's fight here a couple weeks ago was a gas lamp incident. I was just a violent motherfucker, always. I've always had this fucking level of aggression. I don't know, it's cause, like... I had this chip on my shoulder to fucking prove something. Being Indian, and being in the fucking Marine Corps, like my balls were fucking busted blue, right? So growing up, being Indian, in the Central Valley of California, with a name like fucking Raul, if you didn't speak Spanish, you were getting your fucking ass beat, because all the other Latinos were like, Oh, this fucking motherfucker thinks he's better than us. I always had it's always been a fucking fight, man. I'm going to digress a little bit growing up in India, fucking just dirt poor poverty, didn't know shit. I didn't even know I had a dad until I was six years old. I got a fucking flight out to California. So then I'm living with. my dad and my two brothers for about seven years without my mom. And I think just a lot of fucking anger because I'm a young kid in a new country. I don't speak the language. I don't know the customs and courtesies. So it's just a lot of anger just pent up from there and just built. And then the Marine Corps was really my fucking released. Like I can go fight motherfuckers. I can go be a fucking badass, whatever. And so touching back on that story and in the gas lamp, we're out fucking drinking, just having a good time. And all I see is some dude fucking mouthing off one of my boys and Governal gets up in the mix. He's like fucking jucking, diving on this fucking dude and I just step in and homie throws like 20 fucking punches, misses every one of them. I just rock back, bow, pop him once, fucking hit him so hard he does a 180 face plants and his little fuck, his boyfriend, whatever the fuck he was with him, he's all trying to take pictures of me and Governal. I look back, Governor all runs up, kicks that dude that I just knocked out right in the fucking face, drives his fucking phone, smashes it. We're all fucking dressed up in our American Eagle fucking button down skinny jeans and fucking shoes. And the fucking, the bike cops come and they're like, hey cops. Me and this fucking dude, we fucking sprint, rip off our shirts, go like three blocks up, three blocks over, and come back all out of breath. In fucking white t shirts. You're like, hey, what's going on? You guys okay? What's all the cops over here? What's going on? So yeah, we got into a lot of shit like and there's another time down there that fucking strip club right outside of MCR D Make sure you Watch what you say, because he's open to the a, it was a strip club there. So me, Justin Governell, Justin Sawyer there, right? And Sawyer's just gone. This boy can drink like a fish, but when he's drunk, like he, you'll see every bit of it. And me and Governell are looking for him. We see him. He's coming back. He's all distraught. He's hey dawg, what's up? He's these two fucking boots, they told me they were lieutenants and they tried to take my money and this and that. I'm like, where they at? Where they at? So me and Governor, I'll just lose our shit, like you're not fucking with our boy. We get to fuck with our boy, not you. So we go outside, and he points at these two dudes talking to some chick in a little fucking four doors without even thinking any question. I just look at Sora, I'm like, that's them? He's yeah, and Governor's let's get it, dawg. Dude, I run up, I crack the fucking homie right in the back of the head, and I'm like, what's up, bitch? You're a fucking lieutenant. What's up? I'm a fucking private. Governor just starts kicking this other dude in the leg. So he falls in like they're in fucking tears. Like we're boots. We're in the fleet at this time, but these fuckers are still at SOI. Not gonna happen, bro. We knocked these dudes out and we look at Sawyer's like, how much money did they take from you? He's 20 bucks. They're like, all right, go to this guy's wallet, pull out a 20, leave them there and get Sawyer's money back. So they actually took money from him. What's that? So they actually took money from your boy? Yeah, they took a 20 from him. So I was like, you're not going to take any money from my brother. Fuck that. That's fucking crazy, man. That's my job. He's going to buy me beer. They got what they deserve. Absolutely. Absolutely. Typical Marine Corps Knight. 3 1 especially. Transitioning through all this as far as PTSD, have you seeked help? How are you mentally? You good? Did it cut off again? There we go. Yeah. We got you loud and clear. All right. Cool. We can't see the camera though. Oh, come on, man. What's going on here? I could. There you go. There we go. There it is. For an Indian, I should be better at technology. I can talk all day. Yeah I did deal with it and it got pretty bad at one point. I was drinking myself to death damn near, and then I had my first kid, and it still didn't go away I was in Sacramento at the time I went to the VA for help, and the most that they could offer me was Lunesta, Ambien, up my dosage which really fucking made it worse, man it got to the point where, My baby girl was probably about four months and I put a fucking gun in my mouth because I just couldn't deal with it. That's crazy. I couldn't deal with it. The only thing that fucking pulled me through to this day I say she's my saving grace was my baby girl. I heard her crying and I fucking snapped out of this funk that I was in and it's what the fuck am I doing, man yeah, I'm a fucking dad now, like I can't fucking give up. I didn't give up the first time I fucking broke my shit in boot camp. Why am I letting this get to me? And I realized a lot of these fucking sleeping pills, this medicine and shit that they prescribe, it doesn't help, man. It doesn't. All it does is it puts a fucking minor band aid if it even works for you. For me, it didn't work. Yeah, it numbs you to everything. There's, I love fucking music. There's a great fucking song. I don't agree with a lot of the shit that this dude says, but there's a song by Macklemore called Drug Dealer. And in it, one of the fucking verses is my drug dealer was a doctor and he got the plug from Big Pharma. He tried to kill me for a dollar. And like that shit fucking resonated so much with me, man. Cause it's like, why don't we try the fucking holistic approach? Like Marijuana, fuckin is a great fuckin tool that, that helps to fuckin calm the mind down. There's sativa, there's indica, there's different fuckin strains. And it's proven. Harvard's doin fuckin studies on it. Harvard, Stanford, they've done studies on fuckin mushrooms, on psychedelics. And even fuckin DMT for dealin with fuckin PTSD. It's just, there's such a stigma around it that they'd rather promote big pharma than these fuckin independent people. Like obviously marijuana is legal in fucking California, Colorado, fucking Arizona Oklahoma and plenty of other states. Yeah. So I think it's now time to push to get this legalized, man. Instead of these fucking pills that have all this shit in there, turn to a more natural approach. Yeah. And I think it's coming. I think that whole marijuana thing, I think it's growing and there's more studies that are going to come out. A lot of vets that, that I know and talk to, they use marijuana, and it helps, so I think it's definitely coming to the VA, man, I hope it does. In the state of Texas, there is a care law that you can utilize it for PTSD. I've got, there's a link on the study that they have and the regulations. If you want Jose, I'll send it over to you. I can't call you. It's Robledo. Fuck it. I'm sorry. That was a mistake. There you go. My bad. What did I tell you? What did I stopped all the fucking... The pills and shit. Like I found out that to shut my mind down, I got to wear my body out. And that's when I picked up rugby. So I started playing rugby out in California and I did that for four years. Like after two or three fucking sessions, I couldn't think anymore. I was just fucking tired. So I translated that. And that's when I started having that realization, as it gets, you have to face it. You can't run away from your fears. You can't run away from your troubles. You have to acknowledge that you went through some shit that other people haven't. You have to acknowledge that you weren't alone there. And you really have to fucking reach out and talk to your brothers. There's a handful of guys that I talk to on a regular basis. I, obviously I keep in touch with you now. Cause I got your number, Robledo. I talk to Green. I talk to Governal. I talk to Eric Farrell. Ronnie Nolfe, Matt Haviland, and there's a whole group of guys that just randomly fucking text him, Hey, what's up, what's going on? And I've been blessed here in in Liberty Hill, Texas the jujitsu gym I train at is about 90% fucking veterans and Leos. So I've got maybe five or six fucking Marines that are here. I didn't serve with them, but they're still Marines. We've got a shit ton of army guys. We got a couple of Navy boys and even a fucking puddle pirate that trains in there and, it's just that camaraderie, man, I think that's what you miss the most. It's not the organization, it's the fucking people that made that place and that's what you fucking miss. And I've told my wife plenty of times I've told some of the other Marines around here that I fucking talked to the shit going on in Ukraine. If it fuckin pops off, I would do it again in a fuckin heartbeat if I had the same fuckin guys that I was with in Iraq. Heartbeat. No fuckin questions asked. Fuck yeah. And that's what it is, man. It's you start off hatin one another cause you're fuckin different and you don't know anything about the other guy. My, my best fuckin friend, Justin Sawyer. I hated that fucking bitch with the fucking, we were in fucking boot camp together. This dude picks a fucking fight in the fucking squad way, squad bay after fucking shower time with this other fucking kid who was a fucking pogue. Yeah. Did you guys get dressed? No. I had a towel on and fucking shower shoes. It gets better. So Sawyer's this guy's a fucking Pogue man, he's picking on me. I was like, all right, bitch, handle your business. You're a fucking wrestler from fucking Michigan. What's up? Damn. And this dude said something that that I thought he was talking to me, but he was talking to Sawyer. So I'm standing there shaving my face. I got shaving cream all over my face. In my fucking shower shoes, towel around my fucking balls, and this dude just said something, bro. I lost my shit. I just turn around and start fucking jacking this dude. Towel flies off, drill instructor runs in. AHHH! I got my fucking dangling hanging out, I'm fucking punching this dude. What the fuck? I was like, I didn't even know what to say. I went to fucking pray rest. It's just my fucking dick hanging out He's put a fucking towel on Never got in trouble before or nothing. So I was like, all right, cool. It's over when I graduated when we graduated Yeah, Joe Spector, fucking Staff Sergeant Smith came up to me, he goes, if I ever have to look at your fucking cock again, motherfucker, I'm going to cut it off. You're a fucking Marine now. My bad. And now you're best friends with this guy. Man, I love this kid. I fucking do anything for Sawyer, man. And he's the guy that, that we got into a fight for at that strip club that I was telling you about and that's the funny thing about the Marine Corps is like you are any branch of the military, really you come from different backgrounds, you come from different fucking lifestyles. Like I've known a couple of guys bootcamp. And I've known people that have come from poverty that had nothing much like myself, but we don't know anything about one another and we get put into this situation where you're either gonna end up liking one another, you might save in their fucking life, but at the end of the day, that motherfucker is going to become your brother, you may hate him. But you fucking love them at the same time and that's one of the realizations that I've had over the years is All these fucking memories like I look back and now everybody's got a smartphone. Everybody's got a fucking camera I wish we'd taken more fucking pictures together, man, just to relive everything. Yeah I gotta sit in a situation there's actually an episode that we're gonna release One of my buddies that we became really good friends. And same shit, man. We hate each other. We're about to, we squared up one day, we're about to throw it down and now fuck, man we're boys, so yeah, I know exactly what you're talking about. Any, did any thoughts about reenlisting or if not, what did you do right after the military, man? I did have thoughts of reenlisting men like at the time, Captain Haney, he came to me. He's Hey you're good enough Marine. I think you should reenlist. And this was that transition where Iraq was ending and they didn't know what else was going to happen. This is before even Afghanistan. Came a thing and they went to peacetime Marine Corps man, and they're doing fucking you got to go to this force You got to do footlocker fucking this inspection that inspection fucking height and weight requirements Even the first class BFT like I got a fucking I got a negative counseling For being slightly above my fucking weight and it was just like you're gonna knock me for this shit But forget everything else that I've done. Nah, I think it's time for me to bow out man. You know what? I'll do my time and get the fuck out right after I got out Actually worked for a bioscience company. I was doing ag research all throughout, California had no training in it But if you show me some A couple of times after that, I'll fly solo. So I worked for them for about a year and a half going up and down the California coast, central valley. I flew out to Israel, flew out to Chile, just doing plant growth regulators. So basically we were given great steroids so the farmers could have an earlier harvest, earlier yield. And found out my fiance at the time was pregnant. So we got married, ended up going into a sales. Obviously I can talk shit all fucking day long, so I can tell you whatever ended up going into sales for HVAC, man, and I did that for about four, four and a half years. And my wife got a job offer out here in Texas. So it's fuck it. I don't have anything lined up, but I'll find something. Let's go. I want to support you. I want to be there for you. At this time we've had. We had two girls, so we moved out to Texas. She was doing interior design at a company I was working at cheaper than dirt because they had a storefront in Central Texas in Round Rock. And so once working there just saw a dude walk in a couple of times, had a Marine vet hat on, got the opportunity to talk to him, just gave him, great customer service, was attentive, wasn't trying to sell him any type of bullshit, answered all his questions. He handed me a card right around New Year's. He's hey man, you ever get tired of this shit? Here, give me a call. Didn't even look at the card, put it in my pocket. I was like, bro, they paid me to play with guns. I'm solid, I'm good. So I get back home, my wife's doing my laundry. She's hey, what's this? Who's this vice president that you talked to? I was like, oh fuck, I don't know. It's a guy named Jeff. He came in. I guess he was the vice president of a multi million dollar fucking company that did disaster recovery. Damn, dude, that's nice. After New Year's, took him up on his offer. I called him, went in for an interview. He goes, you're hired. What do you want to get paid? I'm like, I was making 15 over here. If I can get 20, I'll come work for you. He was like, okay, you got it. Fuck. Yeah. And then I was with them for about six years, man. Traveled all over the fucking country. I went to Canada, Puerto Rico. We had some jobs right up in Europe, but that kind of fell through. So every major hurricane that happened since 2015 tornado. Fire, whatever. We were there. We were doing all the disaster cleanup. We were doing, we were dealing with the bird flu, Ebola, all that shit. So again, no training in it. Just on the job, fucking telling me what to do. And I started out as a supervisor. By the time I left, I was a project manager after Hurricane Harvey. I was running Ingleside ISD, and that was about, say, 75 million project that I did by myself. From there, I went to Puerto Rico, and from there, I went to Florida. Florida had two production facilities that were like 100 million, so it just kept going up and up. Money was amazing, traveling here, there, everywhere, but I wasn't around my kids. About three years ago, I made a decision. My youngest daughter was four at the time and she says, Daddy, I miss you. When are you going to come home and stay home? And I just fucking hit hard, man. I've been poor. I've been rich or well off. And what the fuck am I doing this for? I'm doing it for my kids, but I'm not making memories. I'm just making money. Exactly. Money I can make at any fucking time. Memories I can't. It just goes back to that time where I wish I had a fucking camera. You know what I mean? Big pictures of the shit we did, the time we spent. And that just clicked in my head, man. Like, all of it it just came together like a puzzle piece. Okay, fuck it. I'm gonna be a stay at home dad. I got the disability check coming in from the VA. Got it up to 100%. I started going to college. And I'm a fat kid. I like to eat. Started toying around with some fucking recipes. And about two years ago, man, I started my own company. It's called Bombs Away. Barbecue. I do barbecues barbecue sauces, salsas, and caterings. And it's just something I do because I'm passionate about it and something that I get my kids involved in. So it's just, it's something I can leave behind for them that's not just money. And that's where I find my happy place now. So that's what I'm doing. Dude, that's badass, man. So how did you narrow it down to barbecue, man? Me and Indian, we have a lot of flavors and I'm in Texas. So you've got the Texas smoke I took. It's called Tex Jab. So a Texan with a punjab. You take all these flavors and you combine it with that smoke. Robledo tried that pulled pork I brought down there. And just take the garlic, the cardamom, the cumins the tumerics and just rub it in, man, and just use the Texas smoke and that heat and that solid barbecue and just put it all together. Shit sounds pretty, pretty good. All wants to do is put his meat in everyone's mouth. Hey, that's my goal in life. You're next. You're next. I was already there. He's next. I'm, he's, it definitely sounds, and I know Roberto, you said you got some events coming up. Down there in the valley, bro. Let me know. I love to just bring the smoker down there and beat a bunch of people and put your name out there and whatever we got to do. Yeah, no, for sure, man. Yeah, so we joined, I started a painting company. It's already been two years where we select a veteran every year and we paint their house. So this year we're about to release. Sorry, I couldn't help, but look at that cup, man you still eat in and out over water burger. This is just a drink, sir. There's no hamburgers in my hand. My kids don't know any better. My kids don't know any better. So they like the burgers. I like the drink. All right. All right. We're clear. All right. Go back to this. So yeah. So yeah, dude. We released the flyer about. March, April, and then we start taking nominations till October and then about the last week mid or mid October, we select the veteran and everything's based on necessity. You know what I mean? So people have to write a little short email talking about the vet. And then we make a selection based on the house and yeah, man, so last year we had a bunch of volunteers. We had a actual barbecue company actually come out and to the people. So man, come out and help us with that. That'd be amazing, man. Absolutely, brother. Yeah, you tell me time and place, man. I'll do lunch slash dinner one day for everybody that's there. Hell, I'll get my hands dirty while the meat smoking. I love doing demo, man. That's for disaster recovery. That's what I did, man. Down in Louisiana where it always floods. We did we did section eight housing. We did a bunch of housing blocks and I was gutting out 2000 square foot houses a day. So that's crazy. I can't put shit together, but if you want me to break it apart, you call the brains. I can push it together. I got that part. So the where we went to is a veteran business outreach center. I don't know if you ever heard of the branch over there, Austin or something, but I don't like to go to Austin. No, no one does, but I'm saying like cause now how homeless people are there, whatever, going crazy and shit. That's where we got help too. Okay, your business plan and everything to get our shit going to get everything going So this better Veterans Business Outreach Center VBOC is a program based off of the small business association So they're a program dedicated to veterans and helping them start a business and helping you create a business plan And actually going through a long process if need be. So in case you ever wanted to expand your business, That's a source there, man. One of my buddies that I went to school here at the university he's actually the one in charge here. And I think they're in charge of Cause right now, Paul, out of Texas, bro. Something like that, because he was over there in Houston. Yeah they travel and give Presentations about VBuck and stuff, man. Have you ever been thinking about expanding or setting up shop somewhere, or... Yeah, that's definitely coming down the pipe, man. So my, I've already got my business plan. I've got enough funds from the sale of our house. We're trying to close on a piece of property right now where it's going to be self sustainable farming. Like we're doing rain catching systems. We're going to have a couple heads of cattle. Obviously we got wild game out there. So I include that in my meal prep menu. Cause I do about it. 60 to 70 meals a week for a lot of the guys at my gym and just local customers I have here. So I'm growing the business slowly cause I don't want to overextend myself. So now that I'm three months away from getting my bachelor's in project management use my GI bill for that. That's when I'm going to take it to the next step. So this land closes, we've already got enough capital set up beside to where I'm going to get a food truck and be more mobile. That's the plan like a brick and mortar during this time just doesn't make sense because I don't know what the 19th 20th fucking variation of Kobe it's going to be and they're going to shut that shit down and, all the fucking overhead. This way. I'm outdoors man and it's just, it's more natural it's more organic like you, you pull up and it's like a chuck wagon in the old fucking days. I got the smoker going. I got the plates ready to go. You fucking come in, eat, get the fuck out of my life. That's what I want. Put my meat in your mouth and go. There you go. Come back tomorrow. Take it and go fuck off. Oh man. Yeah man, that's that's what I got going on in my neck of the woods. So if y'all are ever up here, hell, come on by. I'll make sure you eat good. And drink plenty of whiskey too. No, bro. No, no whiskey. No whiskey. Jose Robledo is hurting right now, dude. I can tell. He's sleeping over there. Yeah. I drank till what, 5. 30? Something like that. I tried to go to sleep early. Technically, I did. 5. 30 is good. It's early enough. In the morning, right? I don't want to say nothing bad in front of your buddies, bro, but I put them to sleep the other day, bro. I was fucking tired. He was already tired. The sun was in his eyes. He had a little paint in there and he just got sleepy bear. Yes sir. The funny thing is, we were drinking at this place. I guess it's a bar. Ojos Locos. You've probably heard of it or not. So somehow I was fucked up. We didn't get kicked out. I fell asleep on the table and they just kept bringing us beer and we just kept drinking. I don't know how the hell we did not get kicked out of the room. Hey, there's nothing wrong with that. As long as you're taking a nap in your house. I was doing it like this. I was like this. The funny thing is that. I was looking through some pictures a month later and now I just happen to scroll like what the fuck like joseph's sleep and then Oh shit. It was at that bar. We didn't even remember that shit, but definitely good fucking time Those are the best man. Look. Hey, i'll trade you sleep. I'll trade sleep cycles with anybody right now, bro I've got six kids like I don't get no fucking sleep My pull out game sucks nice Yeah, my pull out games like the u. s military in iraq. Oh, we're gonna do it. I promise Oh, never mind. How do you feel after this conversation? I know you had a story, felt like you dropped the pack. Like you just expressed yourself basically. Like for me, when I saw you guys, I was I had an anxiety after I came back home. Yeah. Yeah. I'm like, fuck, like it was so badass. with you guys again, like what? 15 years. And I was like 15 years, man. Yeah. And nothing's changed, bro. Like the human being I knew then it's still the fucking great human being now honestly, after sharing this, I don't feel any different because I've come to terms and I'm, I feel more comfortable talking about it. It's the guys that. Play that fuckin machismo Fuck it, I'm a veteran fool, I'm not gonna talk about shit cause I'm a hard No, you're not, motherfucker. It's okay to be fuckin vulnerable. It's okay. Nobody's here to fuckin judge you. We're here for you. I wanna hear what you've fuckin been through. Cause at the end of the day, We're all going to fuckin this place, right? We have this fuckin goal. Wha Whatever your goal is, my goal is, It's something better than we are today. Tomorrow you want to be a better version of your fucking self, but to get there you got to be honest with yourself And to be honest with the people around you don't fucking keep the shit in Don't let the fucking demon stay in your fucking back, bro let it out talk about it because the more you keep it in the worse this fucking gets And that's the one thing that i've discovered That's why I can't shut the fuck up ever like my wife kicks me out of the house. It's like just shut up go Get out of here. And that's my personal fucking thing like everybody's got their own fucking path in life man Like, we all want to be rich. We want to be successful. We want to be this we want to be that's great That's your fucking goal. That's what you're aiming for It doesn't mean that we got to walk the same path, right? You got this windy fucking up and downhill that you had to come through This motherfucker over here swam through a fucking river to get to where the fuck he had to be But it's all trial and fucking tribulation It's we have to recognize that It's okay to fucking talk. It's okay to be vulnerable. That people won't fucking judge you the more you talk about it. It's like being a little fucking kid off of a plane from India and not knowing shit. And having everybody make fun of you for the longest time. that fucking just got under your skin and you didn't know how to fucking deal with it until you became a fucking marine and then these guys that you're supposed to go to war with are fucking busting your balls and one day you just fucking snap and you use self deprecation and you realize i'll take whatever this is and i'll use it as a tool instead of it being a fucking weapon against me i'm going to turn it as a fucking tool so i'm going to use the shit that i've been through to mold the next steps that i have to fucking take but i have to be comfortable with where i've been and to where i'm fucking going Yeah. Yeah. That's awesome. I'm happy to hear brother that you got that mentality. Joey and I started this because we know some vets, man, and I've met, I talked about it in a previous episode that we're going to release before yours. When I go out and do estimates, man, there's still Vietnam vets that haven't got out of that stage. You know what I mean? They're still secluded. They don't like going out. They don't like talking to people. So it's 50 years now. Yeah. Think about it. 50 years. So I'm glad, man that you've learned to, to turn it on and you know what you want to do in life. And my hat's off to you, brother, with that, and I hope that other vets going through shit right now, this is proof, man, that it, that there is life at the end of the tunnel, man, you just gotta focus on yourself, and if, if we could fucking do it, you could fucking do it, because, shit, like Rahul said, he had a fucking gun to his mouth, bro, yeah. And I've had a fucking rifle to my fucking throat, too, you know what I mean? We've been there, but, you Why fucking give up, man? First, in my opinion, you gotta love yourself, bro, before you do anything else. You know what I mean? Cause there's guys that don't have family, they don't have wife and kids. But you just gotta love yourself and do it for yourself. Not because your mom's telling you or your brother's telling you. Do it for yourself. That's the way I see it. Yeah, apart from that family setting, you've got a group of fucking brothers you may not have a wife, your parents may have passed, you don't have kids, you've got brothers, man, and just fucking reach out, don't be fucking afraid, we're not gonna judge you, are we gonna bust your balls? Abso fucking lutely, that's my way of telling you that I fucking love you, and that's, it's that macho stigmata that, that we had to fucking bear, it's that tough skin that we had to fucking wear, you And for some guys, it's easier to peel that layer back, but a lot of guys can't let go of it. You mentioned the Vietnam veterans. It's interesting cause I've got a guy that he was a fucking warrant officer in the army Vietnam vet. Lost his fucking toe. I just happened to meet him here in town, and I'm fucking serving my meals, and he come up, got a fucking plate. We got to talking. And since that day I've checked on this dude every fucking day. He's had little projects. I've gone over there and talked to him. Yeah. And his wife, she said that... I don't know what you did to my husband, but he's more bearable because he found somebody to talk to. That's awesome. And although there's that, that fucking gap in between service experience, what he went through, what we went through, it doesn't fucking matter. At the end of the day we're still that same warrior class. That needs to just find somebody to talk to, and if that's the best avenue of approach for somebody, whether you go talk to a psychiatrist, a fucking therapist, or just call one of your fucking brothers, be like, Hey, dawg, you remember that fucking time we did this? Yeah, you talk about it long enough, it doesn't become a fucking sticking point in your brain. It's something that you did, and now you're fucking over it, and you're past it. Yeah, I agree. Of course, we would all do it all over again, man. But what is something... That you miss the most from the fucking military. Not having any responsibilities, just doing my fucking job. Shit, I agree with that. That's what we say all the time. Sit in the turret. Just stay alive. Just stay alive. Sit in the turret. Do that. Piss in a bottle. And that's it. Go back. Clean my fucking weapon. Yeah. Yep. That's true. It was the most difficult and stressful situation of your fucking life, but it was the simplest fucking time. Yeah. Now I don't have to worry about. I've got six kids. All right. Which one of you fuckers shit yourself? Who's got this lesson? Who's got that lesson? All right go clean your fucking room. No mommy and daddy time. Fuck. Know what I mean? So it was. It was controlled chaos, man. It was simplicity in the most utter chaos fucking position you could find yourself in. But at the end of the day, like Robledo said, do your fucking job and that's it. That's all we had to do. Keep your weapon clean. Shave your fucking face. Keep your gear fucking not from getting blown up and destroyed or anything and fucking keep it on you And when you got Joel watch your brother six, man, that's all you had to do And at the time you hated it you fuck this motherfucker doing this shit doing that shit I'll do that in a fucking heartbeat right now compared to all the responsibilities we have here now it's stupid simple heartbeat. Take me back. Fuck it. I guess only we understand that Being in there, right? You told us to other people. They're like, oh, that's really hard. I'm like, no, I'm not saying, I'm not saying you don't want, they don't understand one. If they would get to experience it, they would be like. Yes. It's, it is easiest. Yeah, absolutely. The other the other hardest thing that, that I've discovered, I like to cuss a lot, but to talk to me all time. He's like trying to talk to people like I was, I just had to go to California,'cause my father-in-law passed away. So I took a day, we went down to Fresno, Hey, Life happens, man. I had to go talk to my mom because my dad passed away two years ago from cancer. So I'm just talking to my mom I'm, I get caught up in the moment. I'm like, hey mom, where the fuck is this shit? Like, when are we fucking doing it? She's like, why do you talk like this? Why is this foul mouth coming out? I'm like, mom, that's just who I am. I'm, I'm a dumb jarhead. That's how we talk. That's my vernacular. It's catching yourself. Like when I'm at professional settings now, like when I go out and I do caterings, I can't be like, Hey, motherfucker, you want some of this meat? Nah, fuck you. Didn't you remember the hot pizza? Motherfucker. Pizza motherfucker! He died, man. I know he died. I cried, I'm not a geek. I'm sitting there looking on Facebook, my wife's like, Why are you crying? I'm like, I'm not fucking crying. What are you looking at? I'm like, my pizza delivery guy died from horno. Oh, shit. He would walk around base every day. At 12 or like 1150 be walking around hot pizza motherfucker. No, it's not pizza. Just all day he never really worked at Little Caesars He I know he sure I know what all the fucking pizzas it would do it son of a bitch Cuz they were five bucks He would sell it to us for ten. No shit. See but he had the cap And a little unicorn shirt, and some khaki pants. Khaki pants were what sold me, I'm like, he's got khaki pants, he's official. He had fucking, yeah he made a lot of dough bro. His trunk was full of pizzas, his back seat, everything was just full of pizzas. You said Fresno man, I used to live in Fresno. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I went to Hoover. Hi, buddy. Oh, for real? Yeah, dude. I went to Roosevelt. Oh, Roosevelt. Yeah I was at the child care center over there. The one that was like one of two fucking schools when I graduated. One of two schools that had a fucking daycare. Like y'all need to stop fucking over there in Roosevelt, dude. That is true, man. There's a lot of chicks, man. I only went there for my freshman year and then I came back to Texas. But I've been in Fresno, shit, since I was 3 to 12. So yeah, man. Yeah, I grew up in front of Fresno Stateman, those blue apartment complexes right there. No shit. Yeah. I grew up there. And then when we, when I got to high school, we my dad got a house over by the high school and we had a Indian restaurant over on Sean Marks Bram Bull. Okay. Damn, that's crazy. Over by Eddo. Yeah. Yeah. So imagine we were kids, we were probably fucking crossing paths without even knowing. That shit's crazy. Probably more than likely. Yeah. We probably played football together. What year did you graduate? I was only there my freshman year in Roosevelt. Oh, okay. Yeah, but I graduated in 2004. Oh, okay. Yeah, we probably no. Yeah, unless you played football your freshman year. What year did you graduate? 2002. 2002, okay. Yeah. Probably not, but. Nah, that's cool man. Yeah, I was actually in Fresno last summer, I'm sorry. I know, right? That's the thing. I love visiting, but I can't move. I just can't. I can't do it. No. No. No, definitely not. Yeah, especially the summers. No. No. Dude, there's 10 cities already, all over the fucking expressway now, dude. Yeah. No, now fucking, man, you can't go down 99. Without hittin a fuckin meth head or two. You just can't. It's fuckin bad out there. Yeah, it's crazy, bro. Cause shit I used to work right there in the ranchos. Just past Fresno, in the Madera Ranchos. When I was younger, before my parents had the restaurant. I'd go out there during the fuckin summer. I'd be pickin grapes. There you go. Nice, dude. No wonder everybody thought I was Mexican. There you go. The fuckin name sounds like Raul. He's brown. It's just look at the eyebrows, like what are those things? This mother bitch has caterpillars, crazy. Badass bro, so we're getting already here to the closing time brother. I don't know if there's anything you want to conclude. Something you want to say to the other brothers out there struggling man with PTSD and depression. Hey, man. Just remember at the end of the day, when everything's fucking closing in on you, man, when you get claustrophobic and you look around, you don't see anything. All you gotta do is pick up that fucking phone. Call one of your brothers. If he doesn't have the next one, somebody's gonna fucking want to hear what you got to say. I'd rather listen to your voice. Then you get a fucking text that you're not here anymore. Yep. So depression, it'll get the best of you. It's like a, it's like a fucked up dream that you can't wake up from. But at the end of the day, you're not alone in this, man. Nobody's fucking alone. If you wore that fucking uniform and you were in fucking country. You got a group of fucking brothers that love you, you just don't realize it because you gotta, like you said Nelson, you gotta learn to love yourself again before you see that other people love you. So you're never alone in this fucking life, man. You got a brother always. That's right, man. And one thing I want to say, and this comes to my head, whenever I feel like fucking, sometimes you just feel depressed. There's days where you just fucking go through those fucking days, and I just tell myself. You know what? I was a badass motherfucker. You know what I mean? You're fucking right. I, that, and I tell that to some of my friends like, Dude, You were a badass motherfucker. Remember that shit, man. Walking the streets in Iraq, nobody could fucking touch you. Have that fucking mentality right now. You're a badass motherfucker. Nobody could fucking touch you. At 19 years old. Yep, at 19 years old. That's right. That's right. Take that shit, put that motherfucker right back on your shoulder. Don't let nobody knock it down. Exactly. But, humble yourself. You're not a drill sergeant, so just, keep it humble. That's right. Keep it going, brother. Awesome, man. Thank you, brother. Hopefully we get the pleasure of meeting each other in person and trying to absolutely barbecue. And hopefully, you mean his meat in your mouth. Yeah, I'm glad you said it. He's blushing. I didn't think brown people could blush. I do want to try your meat. Okay. I have to try your meat. All right. So hopefully this it'll happen this year. Absolutely brother, it'd be my pleasure. Just let me know when and where, I'll be there. You got it bro, alrighty, so this was Nelson Martinez with Combat Mike. Robledo out. Peace out motherfuckers. Bye bitches! Co o m pact Co o m pact Co o m pact